I was flipping channels on the TV tonight and heard a woman talking about where she wanted to be in 10 years. She said just by putting it out there and thinking about it you are closer to making it become real.
I've always hated the question "where do you see yourself in ten years" because I never really could see myself and after turning 40 and having an emotional break down because none of the things I thought would be happening in my life had happened I just quit thinking beyond today. I do know that life is short and we need to make every day count. But maybe we do also need a plan...
Where did I think I'd be at 42? I thought I'd have the nice house with the white picket fence with a dog, cat, two children, two cars, husband, never really thought much about what either of us would be doing to make a living. Where would I like to be at 52? I'd like to be writing, raising a child or children, enjoying life with Vic, hanging out with Britt,working with the homeless or an animal shelter or being a foster mom again ...I'd like to be doing those things NOW...I would have liked to have been doing them 10 years ago. How do I make them happen? Find a sperm donor? Win the lottery? What is holding me back?
I feel a calling that is bigger than me. I am always on the side of the under dog. I admire people so much that make a difference to others...I want to do that. I don't know where or how to start. I am my own worst enemy. Tomorrow is another day..I will try harder. My brain is tired tonight.
Monday, June 21, 2010
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3 comments:
Hi, Holly =)
I really love this post, it's very indepth and flows very nicely.... Even though I know I haven't really started my life out in the real world yet, I find myself asking myself the same questions as you are right now; where will I be in 10 years? how would I like life to be and what do I have to do to reach that goal? will I ever one day be able to make a difference in another person's life?
I believe that you will get to where ever you want to be heading right now; don't give up.
"I admire people so much that make a difference to others...I want to do that."
With all my heart, I believe you have already made a difference in somebody else's life, probably more than a few times.
I hope you're well =)
Taylor
Thank you for your sweet comment Taylor and for reading my blog :)
It's hard to bounce back from not meeting expectations and being where you planned, that's for sure. I thought I'd be married with kids by now, but I'm not. But you know, that's ok. For a while I was sad about it, especially when all my friends were getting married. And now, a lot of those friends are getting divorced. So I guess it's worth it to wait for the right person, even if it takes longer. Though I hope I meet 'him' soon! ;)
I always try to have a plan career wise too. And grad school was a LLLOOOONNNNGGGG road for me, so I'm not quite where I wanted to be yet.
What I learned through it all is that it's good to have a plan, but it needs to be flexible too. Sometimes our plans don't work out how we want them to, but that's life, and we have to be ok with it. It was a hard lesson to learn for a type A like me! :)
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